Troubles in our marriage or relationship hit us hard. Really Hard!
And it’s no wonder if you’re deeply shaken or anxious when your marriage or partnership is changing and doesn’t feel as stable or dependable.
Very likely you’re both having some unusually intense emotions, such as anger, anxiety, fear, confusion, and resentment… or perhaps the opposite reaction of shutting down, feeling numb, or walking on eggshells around each other.
Having waves of emotion or pulling within when you’re having marriage or relationship problems is completely normal. It’s an early warning and self protection system built into our brains – to alert us when something valuable or crucial to our well-being is at risk.
So, intense emotions or withdrawing are perfectly normal… but they do make managing these challenges much more difficult and sometimes, actually impossible. When emotions run high our brains literally shift into a different mode… and we’re simply unable to think as clearly or effectively.
Yes, our emotions are important and natural, but without knowing how they function and how to manage them, they can quickly cloud our judgment, result in uncensored words and actions, and literally switch off our ability to communicate with our partner in a cooperative and compassionate manner.
Even the most sincere attempts at communication quickly fall apart once anger, or fear, or hurt or another strong emotion gets triggered. On the other hand… ignoring, avoiding, or tiptoeing around difficult issues may successfully avoid some arguments, but at the cost of having the genuine affection, closeness, and intimacy you want with your partner. And it’s almost certain to continue slowly chipping away at your connection.
Marriage Counseling Offers Practical Solutions
Every couple I’ve met at Asheville Marriage Counseling is completely unique and facing specific challenges. But, there’s one common theme that leads couples to counseling. Simply put, some part of their marriage or relationship isn’t working well for them… and they haven’t figured out how to make it better on their own.
If you’re in that situation, Asheville Marriage Counseling is here to help you shift out of a cycle of unhappy tolerance and things slowly getting worse… and instead reclaim the kind of marriage and true connection you want together. Or perhaps, to have that for the first time!
When you use the assistance of a relationship counseling specialist you immediately gain several specialized resources to assist you. You not only have the advantage of the counselor’s knowledge, experience, and in-depth understanding of relationships; but marriage counselors also provide additional temporary guidance to help stabilize your relationship while you’re taking steps to transform your marriage.
Asheville Marriage Counseling guides you to master the art of your relationship by:
- Taking a fresh look at your challenges using an expert’s guidance
- Determining where to direct your efforts to get the most benefit
- Discovering hidden triggers that blowup sincere attempts at communication
- Learning what is necessary to be “heard and understood” by each other
- Creating specific plans to catch and interrupt the triggers to arguments
- Understanding the real causes behind feeling disconnected or out of sync
- Guiding you into proven ways of restoring closeness and connection
- Learning how to have safe, respectful and honest disagreements that get resolved
- Supporting you in sustaining your progress until your changes become stable and reliable
Marital therapy or relationship counseling is a specialty and is significantly different from individual counseling… just as the expertise of a joint specialist is different from that of a family doctor. At Asheville Marriage Counseling I work exclusively with couples, marriage, and relationship issues.
My emphasis is on identifying and putting into practice “real world” adjustments you can make; not only to overcome your current struggles, but also to provide you the means to strengthen and keep your core connection vital over the long haul.
Couples are often surprised to discover even a few small changes can start reducing tension and allow them more opportunity to enjoy each other again. Most couples report feeling less stressed and more hopeful within a few weeks of counseling. However, there’s no magic shortcut to having a great relationship. Creating lasting change requires some effort, time, and entering into marriage counseling with your sleeves rolled up and prepared to take action.
If you’re ready for some assistance, schedule a free couple counseling consultation with Geoffrey by calling (828) 686-9601 or email me at Geoffreymail@charter.net
If the idea of meeting with a marriage counselor is new to you, perhaps you’d like to check out: “Why Marriage Counseling?” .
In person and online sessions are available Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesdays. I prefer in person clients be vaccinated for COVID* and able to commit to a regular weekly appointment time. Thursday appointments are online only.
*I am not making a judgement on client’s choices regarding vaccinations. However, I request being informed as I am in a few high risk categories for complications from the virus.